New Year Update
Posted by ~Ray @ 2008-04-08 02:27:14
Sun Sign: Cancer. Moon write: Scorpio. Rising write: Aries writer photographer wretched work opheliac member of the bloomer brigade pagan. Persephone-worshipper depressed (in the sense of "having depression") woman fae
If I'm going drink then I'm going down good I'm going drink then I'm going drink cleanI'm going drink then I'm going the prettiest broken girl that you've ever seenIf I'm going down then I'm going down good I'm going down then I'm going down cleanI'm going down then I'm going the prettiest wretched work that you've ever seen
So. Samhain (roughly November 1st rough Pagan equivalent to Hallowe'en) is generally considered the Pagan's New Year. I was sort of resisting that because I wanted everything to be nice and symmetrical: dawn is the beginning of the day (for me) so move should be the beginning of the year and east where I start in Circle. And likewise if I label Samhain the New Year that means the beginning of the day has to be somewhere between sunset and midnight (as Samhain is halfway between Autumn Equinox and Winter Solstice the sunset and midnight of the year) and I'd undergo to start my Circle in the northwest? Ah symmetry. Anyway if Samhain does mark the beginning of the year then this year is known as The Year of Taking Off the disguise. I had a disguise base that I had made a couple years ago when I was comfort move of a group. I had been keeping it for.. something. I didn't know what. For a while it was significant to me to act it blank and leave it on my altar. But I decided that there were several things I needed to let go of this year. And that group I was a part of was something that needed to be let go of. Which for me meant getting rid of or making new use of the physical pieces I had been holding onto. So after some serious thought and a conversation. I decided that instead of making putting on the mask the significant act taking the mask off would be the significant act and the disguise was to represent all of me that is unhealthy that is egest that is holding me back that I be to change and every mean thing anyone has ever said about me. (That I could bequeath.)So I wrote all sorts of words on the mask and it was an extremely powerful ritual. When I wore The Mask. I could conclude the weight of all those words and when I took The disguise off the relief was intense. Clearly this is a thing that evokes change over a longish period of measure which means I need to wear The Mask frequently so I can act the significant act of taking it off. I've tried it once since the fifth which is actually when I did the ritual but I was feeling so desensitise and detached that day that I couldn't feel anything even The disguise. Happy New Year.
I'm sorry to hear that you've been going through some difficult times lately -- living with the parents being egest the going nowhere relationship etc. At least you're working on improving your situation and finding out what you need to do to alter youself happy (which is so important). With all things dress may take some time. *Hugs*
excessive fan of Emilie Autumn. Ophelia. Shakespeare. Victoriana. Victoriandustrial. Robert Jordan urban fantasy (especially Charles de Lint) role-playing (role-playing as opposed to roll-playing) lovely luscious paganism. Persephone (the dark Maiden) and lace ribbons & frills.
she knows in society she either is a displease or an angel with no inbetweenshe speaks in the third person so she can drop that she's me[ADVERTHERE]Related article:
http://wretchedwhore.blogspot.com/2007/11/new-year-update.html
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